Latter-day Saints on their journey out of Mormonism tend to isolate themselves. As a former Mormon, you may be afraid of being involved in another church, group, or community of faith. You may feel that since a church has let you down before, it is possible that it will happen again. You may feel embarrassed. You do not want anyone to know you were a Mormon, so you do not attend a church. These feelings are legitimate. It is very easy to isolate yourself from people, but it is never healthy to do so.
Solitude Is a Good Thing.
Isolation and solitude are two very different things. Solitude is important. Solitude is being alone – like walking through a park or though the mountains enjoying yourself and nature. We all need solitude in our lives. Try to get away from people for thirty minutes to reflect and relax. Listen to peaceful music, listen to Bible teaching, read Scripture, or talk talk to God from your heart. This is an important habit.
Isolation Is a Bad Thing.
Unlike solitude, isolation is very unhealthy. Isolation is like finding a cave in the mountain, hiding in it, and rolling the stone in front of it. Isolation is just like sitting in a cave in the dark. It is not emotionally healthy. Isolating yourself from people, not trusting others, and hiding yourself are the first steps down a path that could lead to depression or anxiety. If you have struggled with those things in the past, you are headed toward a dark and dangerous place. God created us to be relational beings. You are not going to experience God’s best if you do not have meaningful relationships with other people. These relationships are important for your mental and emotional support. Just because you were burned by the LDS church does not mean it is good to withdraw from everyone. That is not healthy.
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[Related: How Friendship Works]
Overcome Isolation and Connect with People.
It is important to overcome isolation and connect with people. Even if you are not ready to attend a church and make a commitment to it, most churches have less formal groups that you can be a part of. There are usually women’s Bible studies, men’s Bible studies, and various groups on social media. Nevertheless, do not join a group that is hostile toward religion. Be sure to find a group with people who are or have been through what you are experiencing, but are still encouraging and have developed a relationship with the God of the Bible.
Becoming part of a church can be daunting. Your previous experience did not end well. But even though it may be hard, try to see the issue through your new, Biblical perspective. In New Testament times, the church was mainly a community of faith – a group of people who were like-minded and came together for a certain purpose. You do not have to “join a church” to connect with Christians.
[Related: Feeling Shunned After Leaving Mormonism]
[Related: Finding Community in Your New Church]
Recording Your Journey Can Be Helpful.
There are different ways to express what’s happening on your journey. Some people like to write or journal. This can be a helpful way to articulate your feelings. Later, if you are struggling, you can go back and look at the reasons why you left the LDS church. You can see what your relationships were at the time you left and how far you have come. If you do not enjoy writing, you can always record your journey on your phone. Expressing your thoughts will help you navigate through intense feelings.
There Is No Shame in Getting Help.
There is no shame at all in getting help from a professional counselor. Anytime you feel that you need help, contact someone. The issues you are working through are legitimate. If you need to get help, there is no shame in that. A pastor or someone you know who has already left Mormonism can most likely help you find several good, professional resources.
Isolation Is the Enemy.
Isolation is the true enemy here, yet it is something former Mormons lean toward. It is easy to want to place all your problems on the back burner. Nevertheless, you need to be connected with people in a way that is going to help you through this process.
[Related: Five Reasons for Connecting]
[Related: What Does a Healthy Relationship Look Like?]
