While helping a Latter-Day Saint on their spiritual journey out of Mormonism, remember that patience is important. Being a mentor can be stressful, but God is patient with us and we should be patient with others. This unconditional love is a great motivator.
It Is Difficult for Former Mormons to Trust Their Mentors.
Former Mormons have trust challenges. They invested their entire lives into a church that they did not eventually find trustworthy. Now they are expected to trust religious leaders and other institutions. It takes time to rebuild trust. As the mentor, you cannot expect them to trust you instantly. You will have to prove that you are trustworthy. Having been deceived by the LDS church, they may feel like they can not even trust themselves to discern correctly. You have to show them that people love and care about them. Be patient with these people and show them the love of Christ. Former Mormons just need time to develop trust.
[Related: Dealing with Loss of Trust]
It Is Difficult for Former Mormons to Trust the Bible.
Former Mormons not only have a hard time trusting you, but also the Bible. In fact, they may trust you more than the Bible, which is not healthy. Mormons are taught that the Bible has been corrupted. With that background, they cannot just flip a switch. It takes time to begin trusting the Bible.
[Related: Helping Former Mormons Learn to Trust]
Former Mormons Need to Develop Their Own Identity in Christ.
Former Mormons need time to develop their own faith identity. You can not hurry someone into discovering who they are in Christ. Encourage them to read the Bible, pray, take care of themselves, and seek counseling to figure out who they are as a Christian.
[Related: What to Do When Your LDS Mentoree Flip-Flops]
As a Mentor, Your Goals Need to be Selfless.
Your goal in helping others should not be to validate yourself, but to bring glory to God. It’s natural to not want to worry about those you are mentoring. Of course you want them to be secure in their new faith identity. Yet they have to own their new beliefs for themselves. This takes time. Look back at your own faith journey and realize that they need time, too.
[Related: Why We Get Impatient Mentoring Ex-Mormons]
As a mentor, you may feel some urgency, but it is not about you. It is all about working for Christ. We need to trust God with other peoples’ lives. Ultimately, their journey is between them and God. As the mentor, you are not in charge of the process. Your job is to come alongside and help them on this journey. So be patient!
